Q: This question is picking up on something You mentioned earlier about sexual energy causing problems. Could You explain how that happens and what we should do to deal with it?
M: How it happens? Do I have to explain that? (Laughter) I think you should buy a book like the "Kama Sutra" or something like that. It explains better than I ever could. (Laughter)
There are many kinds of energy, different levels, which we possess. Sexual energy most resembles the ecstasy that we have during samadhi. Some people enter samadhi and experience the ecstasy, so they are able to control the sexual energy. Most people, when they have not reached that level and they experience the sexual energy, it feels so good that it makes them off balance. Their body cells react kind of differently. Just like after initiation or when you come out of samadhi, your body feels sometimes weird, shaking, or something. That's the way it is. That is why when people are in love, it is just like walking on the clouds, and they are cuckoo sometimes. Because of the sudden change in chemistry with the chemical reaction and the side effects of it, it puts the mind off balance. They become either overly happy or agitated for no reason, and they cannot reason with themselves or with the partner anymore. That is why people in the old time advised you not to do anything until your marriage. Not only because of the old-fashioned concept to keep the virginity and all that, but just to let you both have time for the body chemistry to get used to each other so when you finally experience that ultimate feeling at the pleasure center, you don't offset your balance. You can continue to be friends and get on with each other, much as before you had sex.
If you have sex too soon, your mind hasn't got the time to assimilate and to know each other; and the chemistry of the body, of the cells, is not trained to be with another person with a different chemistry and a different program, DNA and all that. So when you contact too soon, intimately, the sexual energy will kind of explode and make you both off balance. That is why people say if you have sex too soon, your marriage will not be very good. It is not because the sex is a sin or anything, it's just that your body is not used to it; it's just that your mind is not used to it; your spiritual body has not been programmed so soon to be so intimate. When two persons' powerful energy meets together, it is like a bomb. So, nothing is bad; it is just the way you handle it.
For most people, when you don't have enlightenment to go with it as well, and the whole society tells you that sex is sinful on top of it, psychologically, physically, mentally, and emotionally, you feel guilty. That is bad for your relationship. That is how relationships go wrong. People condemn sex too much in the society, and on the other hand, they don't explain and they don't program people into accepting sex as a part of life or part of the relationship. Then from the psychological effect alone from the society, from the moral standards from your background, you feel already off balance and guilty and that's why you struggle within yourself. You can't handle it. Also, the sexual energy is very strong; it's almost like samadhi. For mortal people, it is just too much for them.
Q: So how should we handle it then if it seems like it's too much for us?
M: You have to understand the nature of sexual energy. But to understand is one thing and to accept it is another thing because we have been brainwashed for thousands of years that sex is bad. I can't even change that. If I go out and preach to everyone that sex is good, sex is okay, they would kill me. (Laughter) So all I can do is tell you to take it easy, reduce it; slow it down if you can, if you want to and if that makes you feel good. If you can't handle it, then the only thing is to reduce it or cut it off until you're strong enough and can decide what to do. And if you want to experience the fire, then you have to take the consequences. Even if I sit here and tell you sex is not sinful or it is okay, you still cannot accept it. Even if you trust me, your mind cannot accept it so quickly.
Q: Thank You, Master.
M: You're welcome. You see, nothing is really bad. It's just the way we are programmed. For example, I say to you, "Don't gamble." Many of you probably wonder, "Why? It's harmless. You just play a few paper cards and bet one or two dollars. What harm can it be?" It is no harm, but it's the side effect. Sometimes you lose, you become a bad loser, or the other person loses, he becomes a bad loser, and this produces a bad energy between each other. You lose a friend and hate each other, and things like that create bad energy, negative energy that you have to bear. You feel choked, you feel pressured. And if it comes to the worse case, you'll be addicted if you win. If you lose, you'd want to regain it. If you win, you want to continue. It's the human mind. It keeps training and training, and after a while, you get used to gambling and you want more. You go to bigger places and you might lose bigger time. Then you hurt yourself - you lose your job, you lose your family, you might sell your wife and kids, even. Some people do that. You see, it is the side effect that is bad. It is not truly gambling that is bad.
Suppose I sit here and do some gambling - would you think that I'm very bad or sinful? No. It might not be so because it means nothing to me. I could play the whole night, I could play my whole life, and it wouldn't mean anything to me. It would not affect me at all. I would not sell you to make more money. But for most people, they can't handle it - just like sex, they can't handle it. They are too weak for these powerful addictions. Like cigarettes, you smoke one, tomorrow two, next day you have the whole package, and then you can't quit. Or alcohol - how many people start with one glass. That's all they start with, even half a glass, or even a sip. Cocaine, anything, is the same. They start with this much, and that's how it grow into trouble. That is why I say stay away from them, even though I do not condemn anything. I know the soul chooses its own path, but whatever you have chosen, whatever you want to choose, you have to know the consequences and choose wisely. If you want to go Home quicker, if you decided that this time you want to go Home, stay away from these distractions. It costs you too much, mentally.
When you look at a naked Indian holy man, you feel elevated; you feel no
shame, no desire, no lust, nothing. Nothing steals into your mind about
lower levels of thinking about that man, and you just have veneration.
If you don't have even veneration, at least you have nothing, not even
curiosity. But the scenes in the movies are differently motivated. They
mean to provoke people, and that is why it is kind of selling the body
cheaply. That is not supposed to be so, because the body is the temple
of God. That's the only thing that is the matter. That is what is not correct
about the movies. I don't mind looking at people without clothes; I have
looked at them before.
Spoken by Supreme Master Ching HaiLos Angeles, CA, USA March 12,1996 (Originally
in English)
In America lately, the president, government, and the congress have asked that violent or sex movies, late-night movies, x-rated, y-rated, whatever they are, be banned from TV because the kids might watch them. It is no good for them. That sounds good, but then some of your judges said, "No, that violates constitutional rights." So, that was not done. Even if there is a good president, good government, or good congress, it is not always powerful enough. There are too many laws, too many catches, too much red-tape, too many loopholes somewhere.
Things cannot be done the way we want - don't talk about world peace. We
may pray for it because that is what we want. We can ask for what we want
but whether it will happen or not, let's see. If enough people want it,
it might happen. But there are not enough people. Most people still cling
to their own opinions. Let it be. In our small group, at least, we are
unified in our idealism, in our desire for peace and happiness in this
world.
Spoken by Supreme Master Ching HaiInternational Four-Day Retreat Washington
DC, USA December 26, 1997 (Originally in English)
The street posters of 'poor' ladies ( jokingly) who have only a few clothes on should all be removed. Don't post them, so as not to destroy other peoples' families, degrade people's spirituality and morality, and ruin youths and girls who are in a period of growth. Have you ever thought that the very ones that are harmed may not be others but your own relatives, your husband or wife, and your children.